Touching Martin Kemp

Well what a night - Cinderella you shall go to the ball - so I dug out my glass slippers, pulled out my sparkly top and away I went with Murph and Spence in tow.

I could not quite believe that THE Martin Kemp was going to be in our local joint - spinning some 80s tunes in a DJ set. So exciting.


So off we set - quick stop off at the local gin bar where we promptly ordered vodkas ??? Yes I know but like the Nolans were "in the mood for dancing" I was in the mood for copious amounts of vodka 😂.  Bumped into some old school pals who were really upping the anti by knocking back Blue Moons - now that is an 80s throwback.

Then we were off to the venue - I could hardly contain myself - the real live Martin Kemp - sex on legs lol 😆. Our excitement was promptly halted when we saw the queue for the bar - huge - massive - very slow moving. So we hatched a plan - we would each ask for a pint glass with 3 vodkas in it and topped with coke - we weren’t revisiting that queue 👍🏻 result. We finally get to the front where the bar woman clearly thought we were complete alcoholics - however when she explained that there was an offer on doubles so did we want a double and a single........ woah there lady - no way - make that a double double 😂. Now she really did think we were alcoholics.

Clutching our very expensive pint glass  - plastic but full of liquid gold - we decided yes we really did need a wee now. Well clearly there was no way could leave our drinks anywhere so they would have to come with us - now that’s another 80s throwback I really didn’t want to revisit 🤦🏻‍♀️. Well would you believe it - as per the norm - massive queue.

Finally bladder emptied - drink in hand - we were ready! We found our spot and awaited the arrival of the gorgeous hunk that is Martin Kemp 😍.  He arrived - all in white - he seemed to have a problem with his shirt though - it only seemed to have 2 buttons on it. It was most distracting. I mean I kept looking at his rippling chest instead of listening to the music. I really could sew him a couple more buttons on that shirt if he wanted.

This man needs more buttons on his shirt  - or less maybe 😏😊

Anyway I set my sights on my mission - I needed to work my way through the crowds to the front - yes the game was on - I was off - dragging Murph n Spence with me.  Banging 80s tunes playing, busting my moves - oh yes I felt sure he was beckoning me to come closer. Finally we made it - the front - inches from him - my hand was up - I was in for the kill. Then that glorious moment when he reached down and touched my hand - I mean I felt 18 again - weak at the knees - mission accomplished- yes 🙌🏻. Happy happy bunny. Yes I will just remind you all that I am 51 and a half and yes this is ridiculous behaviour - I blame the vodka.

He played my song as well “when will I will I be famous”😂. My night was complete when he played what is probably one of the best tunes of the 80s - Tainted Love. Now that’s a tune. What a night - non-stop dancing - I was a big sweaty mess by the end - that was an attractive look. 🙈.

Then it was over - Martin Kemp has left the building aw nooooooo 🙁. As I turned to head off - well to be honest - to head back to the bar 🙊I bumped into an old friend I’ve not seen for years. What a glorious moment - despite my sweatiness (apologies for that) we hugged and hugged - was fab to see her. Shame we hadn’t seen each other earlier - to be honest I probably elbowed her out the way at some point as she was also on target to get a hand squeeze from Martin 😂. A girl after my own heart.

So it was a final trip to the bar where we decided it would be a great idea to order a rainbow of shots 🤦🏻‍♀️ When is that ever a good idea. I have to let you into a little secret here - you see I spent my youth, my 20s, 30s and my 40s  not able to do the whole shots thing. Then at the ripe old age of 50 I mastered it (I know it’s not big - it’s not clever) but I’m quite chuffed that I finally mastered this art - trouble is I’m now a bit like a kid in a sweet shop. Ohhh lets get shots - lets try all the colours - again again again 😂.

Fabulous night - oh Cinderella you certainly did rock that ball. 💕💃